i was asked o contribute a story to a publication in NY
so I have been going through the archives of the old blog.

I just read through the last almost 4 years of my life
and the downward spiral of the last year
was horrifying to watch
at the speed with which i can read.
i wrote nothing of any value
except to the extent that i am now able to see and recognize the decline
and how stupid and blind i was to it.
that i was unaware of the mess that i was making even as it unfolded in front of me
in my own words

now i am left to sit quietly
and test my strength.